There were four in the bed and there wasn’t a spare inch to be found. Three of them nestled together, sleeping head to foot, foot to head, head to foot. I squished into the corner of the top bunk, since my legs were designated pillows. I’d say they tossed and turned but the truth is they just talked. The eldest requested me to braid her hair while the youngest excitedly proclaimed “I hope you come back really soon.” Only to break the silence minutes later by stating, “As much as I want you to come back really soon, I hope my mom comes back sooner!” Their imaginations ran wild and they narrated a night of wonder creating villains and heroes who encountered everyday plots with heroic virtues. Two hours later, I begrudgingly left their room realizing that was the only way they would actually go to bed.
“Kids are a gift, The only reason people don’t have more is for selfish reasons. I know that’s the case for myself,” she explained. It was a rather matter of fact statement and yet it provoked a flurry of questions for reflection, especially in light of the previous night’s joyful, wonder studded evening. Though she spoke of her hesitancy to receive the gift of more children, it made me realize that there are times when I refuse the gifts God’s giving. How do we see the gifts we’ve been given and yet construct certain boundaries to limit the love of God, to minimize the gifts He has given and wants to give? What gifts have I refused to accept from God because of my selfish reasons and selfish intentions erroneously thinking the gifts God offers contradict my way and my plans? What good gifts have I blocked – whether out of fear or selfish ambition - because the gifts didn’t come packaged as I expected or hoped?
As we prepare to celebrate the Epiphany this weekend, what gifts have you received from Christ this Christmas? What gifts have you received this year? Name the gifts; name the graces. At the start of a New Year, let us look forward with joyful and expectant hope. Let us replace worry with wonder and let us accept with grateful hearts the greatest gift He has given, the present of His presence. By the gift of Christmas, we know: “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it (John 3:15) “ This year let us resolve to leave His light on.
Verso l’alto,
Kathryn Grace
O star of wonder, star of night,
Star with royal beauty bright,
Westward leading, still proceeding,
Guide us to thy perfect Light
Star with royal beauty bright,
Westward leading, still proceeding,
Guide us to thy perfect Light
A thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn'
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn'
Gimme faith, gimme love, 'Cause I need it!
Show me grace, make me strong, lemme feel it!
Where to go?, Can I walk?, To redemption?
Show me grace, make me strong, lemme feel it!
Where to go?, Can I walk?, To redemption?
We can leave the night on
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